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Jun 24 Transforming Your Reality Jun 17 A History of Muslim Americans’ Political Engagement Jun 17 My Brother is Gay: Navigating the Intersection of Religion and Family An interview with Imam Wesley Lebron Jun 10 Islam and the Romans: Early Muslim-Byzantine Interaction May 20 Reclaiming the Sunnah of Adoption and Foster Care: An Interview with Basmah Salam Apr 29 National Poetry Month: An Ode to Faith, Visibility, and the Conversations We Don’t Forget Apr 15 Beyond Ramadan: Taking Its Lessons Farther  Apr 15 The Power of Saying No: A Reflection on Boundaries

Tag: west

  • Muslims in America: The True Price of Living Here

    Muslims in America: The True Price of Living Here

    Earlier this year, I traveled to Jordan with a relief organization. I spent a week visiting refugee camps sheltering countless Gazan and Syrian families, as well as individuals who have lost their families, including too many child orphans. Often when people visit refugee camps, they return with emotional messages, haunted by the tremendous pain and loss they have witnessed, stories of grieving widows, children without shoes, and nomadic campsites lacking water or basic human necessities.

     

    But beyond these personal narratives, something else comes to mind, a thought that boils the blood of every Muslim who cares. We ask ourselves what caused this immense pain and suffering. The answer? — carnage and destruction inflicted by people who care little about justice, who seem to care nothing about being the direct cause of human suffering. Yet, we know that the Lord is fully aware of what they do.

     

    And the Lord also knows what we do. So, where is the Muslim ummah, two-billion strong, in the pursuit of long-delayed, long overdue justice? Where are we, American Muslims, who enjoy the opportunities and conveniences of living in this country— what are we doing to bring about justice? Are we aware of and willing to pay the price of living here?

     

    Are We Willing to Pay the Price?

     

    The price of living here is you being angry about the injustices prevalent in the world and, therefore, engaged with the political system. The price of living here is you aiming to be the most pious practicing Muslim you possibly can be. You must be, when the land you call home is one of the most politically and economically powerful in the world. The price of living here is you regularly inviting others to Allah’s truth in a way that reflects the profound goodness of Islam: “Invite to the Way of your Lord with wisdom and kind advice…” (Qur’an 16:125). The price of living here is you never compromising on the truth of what Allah (SWT) has revealed and you living by it with firm resolve: “And do not incline toward the wrongdoers, or you will be touched by the Fire…” (Qur’an 11:113).

     

    The price of living here is you being required to learn about the worldwide impact of America’s political system as it morphed into a military-industrial complex, to be aware of how many innocent people that the oligarchy oppresses, and to recognize its taint of discrimination by race, class, national identity, religion, etc., both at home and around the world.

     

    As Muslims, we are called to care and act when we see injustice wherever it may be.  How then can we watch a genocide unfold in Gaza and not engage with our political system? The Prophet (pbuh) said: “Whoever among you sees evil, let them change it with their hand… If you cannot, then with your speech; if you cannot, then hate it in your heart—and that is the least degree of faith” (Muslim).

     

    We see the state of the economy, the government corruption, the immorality of some politicians; and we see scores of people who feel frustrated and helpless. However, many Muslims cast their votes this month, determined to make themselves known as an important and integral part of this country’s political dynamics. They voted to make it clear there are hundreds of thousands of people who see the genocide taking place and cannot remain silent.

     

    Nonetheless, you may think, “I’m just one person, what can I do?” But this is exactly how the oppressors want you to think— that you are powerless, that you are insignificant. But that isn’t true, and the Prophet (pbuh) said wanting for your brother what you want for yourself is a sign of a believer, offering us hope in the importance of our compassion and our actions. The Prophet (pbuh) said, “None of you truly believes until he loves for his brother what he loves for himself” (Sahih al-Bukhari). Conversely, we also hate for our brothers and sisters what we hate for ourselves. Therefore, if we don’t desire genocide for ourselves, we cannot be complacent when we see others subjected to it.

     

    The Fight for Justice Can Never Cease

     

    However, the road isn’t always easy. Understand that when you struggle against evil you will likely face people who wish to see you silenced by any means necessary. These people have demonstrated in other lands the lengths they will go to dehumanize a group and commit war crimes against them. Nevertheless, Muslims’ fight for justice can never cease, particularly for those who live in the West. As followers of Islam, justice for all people is part of our faith-based worldview. We must fight for it until our last breath. We must stay focused, and we must plan, work, and strategize to inspire others as our ummah did in the past.

     

    If you find yourself falling short, remember the Prophet’s (pbuh) words: “The most beloved people to Allah are those who are most beneficial to others” (al-Ṭabarani). If we want to be beneficial to others as our Prophet (pbuh) advised us, and we hope to earn Allah’s love, I offer the following suggestions:

     

    1. Strengthen your relationship with Allah.
    2. Educate yourself and others.
    3. Volunteer your time and skills.
    4. Use your wealth for good.
    5. Speak out for justice even if your voice trembles.
    6. Engage with the political system to your best capacity.
    7. Reassess how you spend your time.
    8. Join and strengthen your Muslim community.
    9. Always keep your intentions pure.
    10. Most importantly, keep moving forward. Get up and get moving.

     

    For those already fighting in the way of justice, alḥamdulillah! There are so many amazing men, women, and youth working for noble causes worldwide and doing what’s required of them by fulfilling their promises to Allah (SWT). “Among the believers are men true to what they promised Allah…” (Qur’an, 33:23).

     

    However, if you’re ever struggling to live up to this noble stature, having difficulty in implementing any of the above suggestions, let the coming Day of Judgment be your inspiration. Imagine standing before Allah (SWT) and Him asking you what you did with the blessings He gave you. So, we should ask ourselves whether we are paying the price of these blessings.

  • Muslim Families: Challenges and Moral Dilemmas

    Muslim Families: Challenges and Moral Dilemmas

    The challenges and moral dilemmas facing Muslim families requires an understanding of the shifts in ideological, social, religious, and political forces that are shaping the structure and function of families in North America. Families are not static or monolithic; each family is unique, yet it is a microcosm of the society at large and is reflective of religious, social, and political values. The challenge facing the Muslim family is to not only maintain its Islamic identity, but to initiate change in the social and political spheres in light of the principles of the noble Qur’an. To achieve these goals requires active participation of Muslims in the political, social, economic, and religious aspects of society. Failing this, Muslims will either be segregated or assimilated. Both processes are undesirable since they lead to the loss of self-identity, which is built on religious and social values acquired from one’s family and strengthened through constant interaction with the larger society.

    Over the past three decades, the North American society has undergone a rapid social, political, and religious transformation, resulting in high divorce rates, spouse separation, single parent families and common-law relationships. There are same sex couples, childless couples, and increasing numbers of women are choosing to work outside the house. These changes are reflected in the parameters of the society’s functioning on the psychological and emotional planes. The rate of depression has been doubling in some industrial countries roughly every ten years. Suicide is the third most common cause of death among young adults in North America, after car wrecks and homicides. Fifteen percent of Americans have had a clinical anxiety disorder. And, pathological, even murderous alienation is a hallmark of our time, reported Time magazine on August 28, 1995 (p.38).

    Muslim Families Are Experiencing Social and Personal Problems

    The paucity of research on the health of Muslim families makes it difficult to provide specific statistical evidence. However, data collected from different sources including this writer’s personal practice as a family counselor over the last 18 years, indicates that Muslim families are also experiencing social and personal problems like the rest of the North American society. There is marked increase in divorce rates, separation, domestic violence, child abuse, elder abuse, intergenerational conflict, and teenage pregnancies.

    The tendency among young married couples is to opt for separation and divorce, rather than work through differences and disagreements when there is tension or conflict in marriage. Barring violence or psychological abuse in the family, seeking solutions through negotiations is the Islamic norm. Marriage requires collaboration, commitment, and above all a sense of responsibility towards oneself, one’s partner, the family, and the society. In addition, a significant number of young Muslims are marrying outside the community. One of the major hurdles for young Muslims to find someone to marry from within the diverse Muslim community is the question of ethnicity and culture. Cultural and racial diversity, instead of being a positive factor, as the Qur’an tells us (49:13), is becoming a dividing factor, since every Muslim group wants to preserve its own ethnic and culture purity. This limits the pool of young males and females for any individual to choose from.

    Also, increasing numbers of young Muslim parents, both the father and the mother, are choosing to work outside the house, primarily for economic reasons, and are relegating the care and nurturing of their children to daycare centers and elderly parents. Both arrangements are inherently insufficient because daycare by its very nature lacks individualized emotional, spiritual, and intellectual care the child needs. Also, the social environment of daycare is predisposed to producing conformity through the process of socialization and leaves very little room for developing an independent religious or social identity.

    Although more equipped to provide emotional, spiritual, and nurturing environment, grandparents lack the physical vigor to cope with the demands of growing children. In numerous instances, language is also a barrier putting both under undue stress. The above social trends in Muslim families point to various degrees of assimilation, or adaptation to existing societal values. This has serious implications for the future of the Muslim family. In Islam, family is central to creating a stable society and ultimately civilization itself. Therefore, if family as a social system fails to provide sound religious and social values for the total physical and psychological growth of a human being, then society will suffer greatly as is evident from the malaise afflicting western society.

    Disturbing Trends in North America

    North America has made much progress in science, technology, psychology, medicine, human sciences, as well as in the standard of living. It insists its social, political, and economic values are the only viable option to achieve human equality, financial prosperity, and peace and justice. Yet it finds it exceedingly difficult to provide its own citizens the peace of mind and a healthy social environment in which parents can raise their children without the fear of random violence in schools, homes or in the streets.

    According to social scientists, the American society is becoming increasingly violent, aggressive, self-destructive, narcissistic, and uncaring towards those who are less fortunate, including members of the immediate family. The Qur’an tells us that the Book was revealed to the Prophet (s) “…in order that you might lead mankind out of the depth of darkness into light…” (14:1). The Qur’an provides numerous examples of what happens to nations, peoples, and individuals who exceed the limits prescribed by Allah. “Have they not traveled on the earth and seen how what was the end of those who were before them? And they were stronger than they in power…” (40:21).

    Muslims make up a sizable minority in North America so the question is: should they not
    be concerned about the state of the family and society, and the rest of humanity; or they feel they have no responsibility beyond themselves?

    Malek Bennabi in his book, “Islam in History and Society,” says that corruption and colonization of people can only take place when human beings are in a state of moral and psychological decay. “Moral paralysis results in intellectual paralysis: when one ceases to perfect oneself morally, one also ceases to modify the conditions of one’s life and is reinforced by moral, social and political paralysis.”

    Unfortunately, Muslims in North America and the Ummah in general seem to fit Bennabi’s description, since their apathy and inactivity indicates that they may be suffering from political, social and moral paralyses. It is easy to blame others for the present predicament of Muslims worldwide, but to hold others responsible for one’s own weaknesses and shortcomings contradicts the Qur’anic injunction of personal responsibility. “God does not change the condition of a people until they change that which is in their souls” (13:11).

    If Muslim families are to survive the current social and structural changes in North America, they must actively initiate social changes in the society in which they live. Humanity is told that as a vicegerent of Allah (2:30), it is under moral obligation to reform its own thinking and behavior in order to create a just and morally balanced self and society.

    The challenge in the next millennium for Muslim families is not from the external environment; it is from within. Islam has a lot to offer to the ongoing debate on the future and status of the family. The practical implications of the answers found in the Qur’an for those who advocate stability of the family and society are immense.