بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

LIVE news updates
Jun 24 Transforming Your Reality Jun 17 A History of Muslim Americans’ Political Engagement Jun 17 My Brother is Gay: Navigating the Intersection of Religion and Family An interview with Imam Wesley Lebron Jun 10 Islam and the Romans: Early Muslim-Byzantine Interaction May 20 Reclaiming the Sunnah of Adoption and Foster Care: An Interview with Basmah Salam Apr 29 National Poetry Month: An Ode to Faith, Visibility, and the Conversations We Don’t Forget Apr 15 Beyond Ramadan: Taking Its Lessons Farther  Apr 15 The Power of Saying No: A Reflection on Boundaries

Tag: mental health

  • Mental Health: Easing Our Burdens

    Mental Health: Easing Our Burdens

    I couldn’t keep count of the times that I “got help” on a test. Whether it came through reaching out to a friend or a family member who had already taken the class or watching hours upon hours of Khan Academy videos. In a similar vein, I’ve received help on the test that is our dunya. Reaching out to imams with my questions, carving out time in my day to pray, sitting inside during recess because I was fasting, and it was 100 degrees outside — these are all examples of getting help on my worldly tests. We don’t look down on someone for taking extra time to complete their tasks or taking naps during Ramadan. Why would we? Muslims (and those who work with us) understand that while fasting is an important tenet of our faith, it is a physically taxing form of worship and accommodations are made accordingly. After all, Allah would never burden us with more than we can bear.

    Why then, do we view our mental health challenges so differently? We don’t question why someone is going to see their doctor. Maybe they’re sick and need to get treatment, or maybe they are just going in for a check-up to make sure everything is fine with their physical health. Why then, do we stigmatize the utilizing of mental health resources? If someone is getting therapy, “it must be because they are crazy,” whisper some in the community, “something is wrong with them.” This stigma about reaching out for mental health services has drastic effects on mental health outcomes. A 2021 survey by Rania Awaad, et al. found that Muslim Americans reported a lifetime suicide attempt rate 2.18 times higher than other religious groups. Depression has been prevalent in our community while there remains an underutilization of mental health resources.

    This Dunya Is a Test

    This life is a test. Something we, as Muslims, hear very often, but it is something that rings true at every juncture. Things are going to happen in your life that will stress you out, things will not always go your way. These tests from Allah are meant to strengthen your eman, and they are not more than you can bear (see Quran 2:286). When a test comes however, we are encouraged to turn to Allah to ask for help to overcome our hardship. We can also reach out to our friends and family for help. If your car were to break down, you may ask your spouse to drive you to work. If you were to be bedridden with an illness, perhaps your neighbor sends a warm meal to you. As a community, we should take the same approach to the times that our mental health is tested by adversity or hardship. If you are experiencing severe anxiety and dread regarding a job interview, you can reach out to a therapist to help you learn healthy coping mechanisms. If a loved one were to pass away and your grief consumes you and does not lessen over time, you can seek out a therapist and talk through your grief. “Better out than in” is some of the best advice from a children’s movie I’ve ever received. Shrek, the large green ogre, said this in reference to his burps, but it rings true for our emotions as well. If we hold them in and ruminate on them without engaging healthy coping skills, we can make ourselves worse and suffer more.

    Be Kind to Yourself

    When we’re traveling, we are allowed to shorten our prayers to ease the hardship. Why not treat our mental health the same way? When we’re struggling with depression, give ourselves extra time to complete our tasks. Focus on the small wins, as these small wins can foster hope and a positive outlook, and they can add up to a large win in the future. Don’t beat yourself up because you slept through fajr, but instead focus on the fact that you were able to pray dhuhr. Being kind to yourself and recognizing your shortcomings while celebrating your victories is the way of the Prophet (s). “The most beloved of deeds to Allah are those that are most consistent, even if it is small” (Bukhari). Being kind to yourself naturally extends to others, so celebrate their small wins with them, and make 70 excuses for the shortcomings of your brother or sister in Islam. We do not know the tests they are dealing with at any given time. We should not only overcome the community stigma surrounding seeking out mental health resources, but we should also actively encourage our fellow Muslims to seek help when they are overwhelmed with their burdens.

    Have you ever had a secret that you just had to tell someone? Did it not feel good to finally get it off your chest? Talking about things lets us hear ourselves out loud, but also may give us new perspectives from another person, ways of looking at a situation that we may not have considered. It may also take away from the mystery and negative power of our struggles.

    Changing Perceptions

    We should change the way we perceive mental health resources. They are not a last-ditch effort that we utilize during a crisis to stabilize ourselves, and then never utilize again. Most times we do not simply end up driving off a cliff, as there are numerous “road ends ahead” signs along the way. If we engage with mental health resources and use them as a form of maintenance, then we may be able to avoid swerving off the road altogether. Seeking help from Allah SWT, talking to a trusted family member or friend, consulting with the community imam, or speaking with a mental health professional — all of these can help during times of stress. There are many self-help mental health resources available online as well, if one is hesitant to reach out to a therapist. Maintenance is key, and starting with the basics makes sense. So, we should try to eat healthy, drink lots of water, exercise regularly, prioritize a regular sleep pattern, learn relaxation techniques, develop our goal-setting skills, and practice gratitude to Allah SWT; these skills, and so many more, are techniques for maintaining and increasing our mental health.

    Yet, when issues seem too burdensome to overcome by talking to a trusted person in your life or by applying self-help strategies, seeking out a therapist makes perfect sense. Some Muslims may feel that talking about their issues with a therapist seems like complaining, but if you understand that by talking about our issues, we are working towards a solution, then it isn’t complaining at all, it is working towards a solution.

    If there were an easy solution to all mental health challenges, the epidemic of stressed and burdened individuals in our communities would have been resolved already, but this issue is multi-faceted. Change in the attitudes and perspectives of a community does not happen overnight, and in our community, it may not happen as fast as we would hope. What each of us can do is make change in ourselves. What’s stopping you from strengthening your coping skills or becoming more aware of your inner dialogue to see if your focus is too often negative? What is stopping you from going to therapy if that is what is needed? Talk about mental health — with your friends, with your families, and within community circles. Make sure those around you know that there won’t be any negative judgement from your side if they see a therapist.

    Finally, remember, there is no shame in reaching out for help. Allah SWT makes concessions for us to make our burdens easier to bear. Seeking out therapy is another way to make your mental health burden easier to bear, and as a way to widen our perspective, increase our self-awareness, and develop positive coping skills. It is our responsibility to change our hearts and minds, to feel compassion for ourselves and others when they are suffering, and to care for our community. And when each of us softens his or her heart, the community as a whole will soften its heart. This life is a test, that is true, but it is also a blessing. Tests will come, but we have been given the roadmap, the compass, and the provisions with which we can navigate through them.

  • Supporting Mental Health in Youth

    Supporting Mental Health in Youth

    Adolescence is a time of great change. Coming of age involves phases of physical, emotional, mental, and behavioral transitions and adjustments. As the individual grows into adulthood, there are various struggles and challenges, and attention to one’s mental health during this time is just as important as attention to physical health. In the past few years, particularly with the pandemic and lockdowns, there has been a tremendous increase in mental health issues in youth of all ages. According to the World Health Organization “globally, one in seven 10 to 19-year-olds experiences a mental health disorder, accounting for 13 percent of the global burden of disease in this age group.” Anxiety disorders and depression are the most prevalent in that age group, with an estimated 3.6 percent of 10 to 14-year-olds and 4.6 percent of 15 to 19-year-olds dealing with some form of anxiety. And 1.1 percent of 10 to 14-year-olds and 2.8 percent of 15 to 19-year-olds suffer from depression. One can assume that there are those who go undiagnosed and untreated.

    Risk Factors

    Many risk factors contribute to mental health issues including an unsupportive environment or even negligence or abuse. Trauma, substance abuse in the family, social stresses, fear, or anxiety — all of these can significantly affect a young person who does not know how to adequately cope.

    Adding to the usual factors that affect the mental health of youth is the pandemic. Numerous studies report on the negative psychological effects of the pandemic and the burden placed on children and youth who dealt with school closures resulting in remote learning, as well as being cut off from in-person friendships and social interactions. This disruption left many children lagging behind in cognitive and emotional development. In addition, the very limited social interactions with others left youth feeling lonely and parents, teachers, and experts have worried about the loss of this crucial aspect of development for children and teenagers alike.

    Combatting Stigma

    Adding to the dilemma is that stigma surrounding mental health challenges continues to plague many communities and/or families, and in some cultures this stigma is very strong and acts as impediment to seeking help or getting treatment. In some racial and ethnic communities, reaching out for help may be seen as a sign of weakness, lack of faith, or mental disease.

    Parents and communities can support children and teens who are struggling with mental health. The first step is to watch for warning signs and take note of emotional and behavioral changes. A child might openly express feeling stressed or depressed or he or she might signal that through acting out or withdrawing emotionally. Parents should make sure to openly communicate with their child about their emotions and feelings. If your child continues to have issues, it is important to seek help and support from a professional counselor.

    The Importance of Mental Health in Islam

    Islamically, mental health is just as important as your physical health and well-being. And is it critical to take care of one’s mental health in order to live a well-balanced lifestyle. In the past, Muslim scholars and physicians such as Al-Razi and Abu Zayd Al-Balkhi understood and acknowledged how important mental well-being is and highlighted the importance of balancing all aspects of the self, including the mental and physical aspects.

    In the Qur’an and ahadith there are many references to the importance of self-care and well-being. One verse describes the importance of knowing that Allah SWT is always with us and will not put any person through hardship beyond their capacity to bear (2:286). Dhikr, d’ua, and salat are prime ways to get closer to Allah SWT; and remembering Him helps to bring peace to minds and hearts.

    Help the Youth Develop Healthy Coping Skills

    Tailored to the age and maturity of your child/youth, the following can help your child maintain good mental health:

    • Model good behaviors and traits including patience, perseverance, resilience, and tolerance. These traits are especially important to demonstrate when the parent herself or himself feels stressed. Children learn from and imitate their parents so being a good role model is essential.

     

    • Help your child learn to look at the problem or cause of stress in a wider perspective. Their first impulse may be to catastrophize the situation. Lead them to view the situation as a problem to be solved and an opportunity to learn. Guide your child to consider factors or aspects of the situation they may not have recognized on their own.

     

    • Let them know that there are some issues that are outside our control and others that we can do something about. When the issue is minor or fleeting, teach them ways to “let things go” like deep breathing and positive self-talk.

     

    • Guide your child to activities such as reading, art, or sports/exercise that can provide great outlets for stress and contribute to coping in a healthy way with challenges and difficulties.

     

    • Make sure your child has a good support system including both family and friends. Let them know they can always come to you to share whatever they are going through, whether positive or negative. Practice listening in an active, nonjudgmental way when your child does share.

     

    • Teach your child to practice gratitude for the good things in their life. This is best done by example so be willing to express your own gratitude out loud, at appropriate times.

     

    • Invest time with your child in volunteer activities. Helping others has many benefits to the one who is helping, including realizing a sense of responsibility to those less fortunate as well as helping to put one’s own challenges in a wider perspective.

    Most importantly, teach your child that remembering Allah SWT, making dhikr, du’a, and salat are essential means to cope in a healthy way with life’s ups and downs; and calling on Him, for young and old alike, is a valuable and powerful way to find peace of mind and heart.

  • Spiritual Health and Mental Health Feed and Enhance Each Other

    Spiritual Health and Mental Health Feed and Enhance Each Other

    As he looked down at the page, he couldn’t understand why he wasn’t able to focus. Reading the Quran always brought him comfort and a sense of peace, but not this time. So he finally closed it and replaced it on the shelf. He got lost in thought, wondering what had gone wrong in his life. His head was spinning and he felt sick in his stomach. He raised his hands to pray in search of relief from his misery. He remained in that position for a few moments before he dropped his hands onto his lap. He couldn’t even find the strength to make dua to Allah (SWT) for help. How had things gotten so bad that even his spirituality wasn’t helping him at his time of need?

    The scenario above is a true one. It was described to me by one of my clients who came in for counseling about a number of issues. He had always been a religious person and turning to the book of Allah (SWT) had never failed to bring him relief and remove his worries. This time was different, and he was feeling miserable. In session, he was critical of himself and questioned his faith: “Am I just not a good Muslim anymore?” He related his inability to read the Quran to having a spiritual blockage. What he did not realize, however, was that his inability to read the words of Allah (SWT) had nothing to do with his religiosity but had everything to do with the stresses in his life at that time. Once we worked on those stressors and cleared the negativity that was clouding his mind, he was able to move forward. He now believed in himself as a righteous person who was just facing issues that were affecting his mental clarity. At the end of therapy, he understood very clearly that spiritual health and mental health are thoroughly interconnected.

    There is no doubt that religion and feelings of spirituality can be a lifeline for those who are struggling in life, whether they are dealing with physical, psychological, and/or relationship issues. The American Psychological Association cites studies done on various groups of people who are dealing with life stressors such as natural disasters, illness, loss of loved ones, divorce, and mental illness. These studies indicate that religion and spirituality help people to cope with these difficulties. It gives them comfort through the tough times and also serves as a support to lean on. Spirituality allows them to have a higher purpose that transcends the difficulties they are dealing with.

    Similarly, there are numerous verses in the Quran that highlight how religious principles and practices, such as patience and relying on Allah (SWT), can be helpful during trying times. Allah (SWT) tells the believers to “seek help in patience and prayer” (Quran 2:45) and “…be patient and persevering: for Allah is with those who patiently persevere” (Quran 8:46). The practice of patience is indispensable during difficult times, and turning in prayer to Allah (SWT) through both salah and dua is a means to find strength, comfort, and wisdom.

    The mistake that many Muslims make is to rely on their religious practice and faith as the only means for finding solace or alleviation of their distress. The belief that turning to Allah (SWT) is the only solution holds people back from also seeking help elsewhere when it is needed. Even though we turn to Allah (SWT), this does not mean we cannot or should not also reach out to human beings for support and advice. Oftentimes, a counselor, support group, or medical practitioner is required to resolve a situation. If we do seek help in counseling, that is not an indication that our iman is weak. In fact, Islam encourages us to seek help when we are unable to resolve problems or challenges on our own. Through counseling, we can address issues that are causing unhappiness or dysfunction in our lives; we can learn effective coping skills, and become skilled at putting circumstances and difficulties in a larger perspective and thus alleviate some of the emotional distress; and we can explore various strategies of practical problem-solving. If we consult a Muslim counselor who draws on both Islamic and Western principles of healing and change, we can even strengthen our relationship with Allah SWT. Unfortunately, many Muslims view the seeking of help through counseling as a stigma, like it is something to be ashamed of. Yet, the Prophet (pbuh) himself was a guide and advocate whom others turned to for advice on marital issues, financial problems, and more.

    We need to allow ourselves to utilize all the resources that are available to take care of our mental health. The reality is that Islam is a perfect source of guidance and insight and solution to problems. But we human beings are imperfect in our knowledge and understanding, and sometimes another person can help us to see things more clearly and offer support as we strive to resolve our issues. But no matter what mental health issues we may struggle with, they do not reveal whether we are religious or not.

    Islam teaches us to focus on the health of our bodies, minds, and emotions, and not to neglect any aspect of our soul’s well-being. Overall health, and particularly mental health, is interconnected with spiritual health. They feed and enhance each other and both must be focused on in order to live a healthy and happy life.

  • Islamic Spotlight on Mental Health

    Islamic Spotlight on Mental Health

    Allah (SWT) says in the Quran, “And We have already created man and know what his soul whispers to him, and We are closer to him than his jugular vein” (50:16). In this ayah, the Lord of the worlds describes His awareness of each and every human being, his or her innermost thoughts, desires, and intentions. The statement, “We know what his soul whispers to him,”provides us with comfort because it gives us reassurance that no matter what we suffer – our sadness or grief or worry – Allah (SWT) is aware of it as well. We are not alone. It also can instill fear in us because we are reminded that the negative, irresponsible, or unvirtuous thoughts that we have are not completely private because Allah (SWT) knows of them as well. Whatever anger, resentment, or jealousy we may feel, He is aware of it all. It gives us a reminder to hold ourselves accountable because the One who will hold us accountable in the next life is aware of everything that goes on in our minds.

    The closeness between Allah (SWT) and His servant is further described by reference to the vein that our lives depend on, the jugular vein that is in the neck. The jugular vein carries large volumes of blood from the brain, face, and neck, back to the heart. Damage to the jugular and subsequent blood loss can quickly lead to shock and death. Yet, He (SWT) is closer to us than that physiological lifeline. There is nothing closer than that. Allah (SWT) is there even in our darkest of times. In our moments of sadness, feeling betrayed or abandoned, the Lord is with us, providing comfort and guidance through His deen, His Book, His messenger, and through our direct access to Him at every moment through salat and dua.He (SWT) is with us always. He has never left us and never will.

    Allah’s Closeness Converges with Examination of Self

    In tandem with Allah’s closeness to each one of us and His knowledge of the innermost self, is the Islamic focus on being self-examining. To be honest with ourselves, to increase awareness of our thoughts and behaviors so as to take fullest responsibility for ourselves and the way we live our lives – this is all part of maturing from the base level of unrestrained desire and impulse to the self-reproaching soul, aiming ultimately for tranquility and ease in daily living. This unfolds as thoughts, feelings, and actions come into harmony, aligned with Divine will. Sometimes we need help in candidly seeing ourselves and our habits of living, or in resolving issues that obstruct our growth, or solving problems that hamper the healthiness of our relationships. Mental health is just as real and important as physical health.

    Yet, mental health is, for the most part, not discussed in Muslim communities, but rather silenced. A common stigma that works against dealing maturely and pragmatically with mental health issues is reflected in people’s negative judgements of those suffering with depression, anxiety, lack of motivation, and other personal challenges. They are often viewed as weak, incompetent, or crazy. Within the Muslim community in particular, this intertwines with cultural and religious views. People see those afflicted with psychological problems as lacking faith, patience, or trust in God. They are seen as religiously weak. Culturally, Muslims are taught to avoid airing their dirty laundry, to keep their personal and family problems secret. Add to this the well-intentioned but misguided advice to turn to God and all your problems will vanish. What is missing from this is that human action might also be appropriate and necessary. The Prophet (pbuh) has told us to tie the camel and then trust in God for her protection. For individuals who are suffering from feeling stuck, dejected, unable to make decisions, or unable to find solutions to their personal or family problems, they end up feeling hopeless and unable to find the support that they need when talk of mental health issues is taboo. This is something that needs to change.

    It is difficult for many Muslims to accept that mental health issues exist. Instead of believing and accepting that mental illness does exist, many Muslims suspect black magic as a cause. They blame their issues on black magic and get caught up in finding out who is doing it and how to get rid of it. Even though there may be a chance that this is the case, it often serves as an unnecessary distraction from the real issue at hand. This can be a dangerous distraction since the real issue can fester while it is not being attended to.

    Awareness is First Step to Getting Help

    It is essential that we bring about more awareness within the Muslim community. In masjids, Islamic schools, community centers, and conventions, we need to offer more workshops and discussions on issues surrounding mental health. We need to normalize it and be open to talking about it so that we can eliminate the stigma and allow for more channels of communication, support, and change.

    For those of you who are dealing with mental health issues, you are not alone. There are so many out there who have or had similar challenges and understand what you are going through.And there are counselors and therapists who are available to help. Reach out for help, have hope that things will get better, and believe that you will be able to overcome your struggles. Medication is appropriate in severe or chronic cases.And in all circumstances, counseling/therapy is a valuable and empowering process that facilitates your determination and effort to transform your life for the better. Give it a chance, and ultimately, give yourself a chance for a better future.