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Tag: compassion

  • An Islamic Model of Marriage

    An Islamic Model of Marriage

    The image of marriage that we are advised to strive for as portrayed in the Qur’an and Sunnah is based on three foundations: taqwa (consciousness of Allah SWT; love of pleasing Him and hope for His mercy, which is balanced by fear of displeasing Him and earning His wrath; virtuousness), mawadda (abundant love), and rahma (mercy). Taqwa guides the practice of abundant love and mercy as will be explained in more detail. We can experience paradise on earth if we really strive to live the Islamic model of marriage. Let us begin by exploring taqwa and its importance in marriage.

    Taqwa

    If we are asked to choose one trait that is essential for marriage, our unequivocal answer should be “Taqwa!” Taqwa emanates from the heart and envelops the whole of the human being. In fact, it is the core foundation from which love, mercy, and caring flow. There are many reasons why taqwa is essential to the success of marriage. Many marital issues in Qur’an and Sunnah are left open to the application of ma`roof, i.e. in accordance with Shari`ah (divine law), justice, fairness, respect, equity, caring, compassion and kindness. Ma’roof also encompasses what is Islamically customary, such as issues of obedience, gender roles, divorce, maintenance and provisions, or even the simple act of just living together as spouses. Only inner God-consciousness, taqwa, guarantees that couples fulfill their marital duties and apply the principles of Islam as justly and as fairly as possible.

    “…They are your garments and you are their garments” (Qur’an, Al-Baqara, 2:187). The word garment conveys feelings of warmth, closeness, protection and security.

    Taqwa of Allah (SWT) is the only reason why a person in his/her sane mind would counter evil with good for fear of transgressing and in hopes of high rewards from Allah (SWT). Abu Huraira (RAA) narrated that the Messenger of Allah said: “…do not hate one another; do not turn away from one another; and do not undercut one another, but be you, O servants of Allah, brothers (and sisters). A Muslim is the brother of a Muslim – he neither oppresses him nor does he fail him; he neither lies to him nor does he hold him in contempt. Taqwa is right here” – and he pointed to his breast three times” (Muslim). The Prophet (SAW) is pointing out that taqwa is the safeguard to help stay away from the evil behaviors he mentions. Taqwa means putting our trust in Allah (SWT). By trusting and following Allah’s (SWT) commands, we can ensure a successful marriage in this life. With taqwa we can trust that fitra (pristine human nature), common sense, and goodness will rise above egoistic tendencies for conflict, power seeking, and vengefulness.

    Taqwa empowers us to live in harmony with our spouses. We may have come from homes where verbal or physical abuse was accepted and regularly engaged in. However, it is not befitting or acceptable for someone with taqwa to follow in the footsteps of such ugly behavior. Both spouses raise their standards when they practice taqwa. Taqwa is the best garment one can wear, whether during marriage, parenthood, work, or any other aspect of life. “…But the garment of righteousness [taqwa], that is the best. Such are among the Signs of Allah, that they may be reminded” (Qur’an, Al-‘A`raf, 7:26).

    Only a person clothed with taqwa will be a comforting companion and a merciful friend. Such an individual becomes a cover and shield for his/her spouse in full embodiment of the following beautiful verse: “…They are your garments and you are their garments” (Qur’an, Al-Baqara, 2:187). The word garment conveys feelings of warmth, closeness, protection and security. It is interesting that the root meaning of taqwa includes to safeguard, to protect, to preserve, to shield, to shelter, and to prevent. It is easy to see why taqwa is the perfect garment for the two individuals in a marriage relationship. Let us look at the following verse: “And among His Signs is this – That He created for you mates from among yourselves that you may dwell in tranquility with them and He has put abundant love and mercy between your [hearts]. Verily in that are Signs for those who reflect” (Qur’an, Ar-Rum, 30:21). Allah (SWT) establishes a beautiful image of an amazing bond between a man and a woman; one of closeness, shelter, warmth, and abundant mawadda (love) and rahma (mercy). These two Arabic words encompass many meanings. Let’s look at each one more closely.

    Mawadda

    In the verse above, mawadda is best defined as abundant love. Couples need to gather and increase their provisions of love, lots of it, to keep the ship of their marriage sailing. Abundant love encompasses many meanings such as affection, appreciation, attention, commitment, joy, respect, responsibility, sacrifice, security, trust, and intimacy. For the marriage to be happy, enduring and fulfilling, couples need to engage in the continuous exercise of loving and nurturing each other. If we do not nurture our marital relationship daily, it withers and dies like a plant without water or sunlight. Loving each other on a daily basis is about feeling close, connected, individually and mutually fulfilled and appreciated.

    At the heart of many marital problems is a poor perception of a spouse, which usually involves our focusing on the other’s shortcomings rather than on our own, letting negative thoughts run wild and building a mental case against the worst aspects of the spouse rather than building an emotional support system for their best aspects.

    There are unlimited ways to demonstrate love, affection, and caring toward your spouse. Tell your spouse frequently how much you love him/her. Loving your spouse is not just about realizing this in your heart but also about telling them. The Prophet (SAW) said, “If any of you loves his brother, let him tell him that he loves him.” This applies to family, friends, fellow Muslims, and most significantly, to spouses. You can call your spouse during the day or send him/her an email checking how things are going. When you call, tell them you miss them or any other sentiment of your choosing that expresses affection and appreciation. In fact, giving a gift of appreciation has great impact. This does not have to be elaborate or expensive; it just needs to be thoughtful. Give something that tells your spouse that you listen to them and are aware of what makes them happy. A preferred dessert, a book he/she has mentioned wanting to read, or a flower may be more than enough. The Prophet said, “Give each other gifts and you will love each other.” And, as simple as it seems, smiling when you see your spouse has a positive and heartening effect. The Prophet (SAW) guided us by saying, “To smile in the face of your brother is a charity…” Always aim to be cheerful, uplifting and humorous. Sometimes we feel this is an obligation towards our Muslim brothers and sisters, but we forget to practice this in our daily interactions with our spouses.

    Most couples are able to discover more about their specific nurturing and love needs as they get to know each other better. The main point is to infuse your life with demonstrations of abundant love that make the bonding between you close and strong. In fact, the bonding was so close and strong between the Prophet (SAW) and Khadija, his first wife, that long after she had died he would remember her and praise her as the first believer and his closest ally on the path of Allah (SWT). In fact, loving each other for the sake of Allah (SWT) is the best type of love between spouses, it is true and enduring love, not just short-term affection. This love helps each spouse grow and guarantees success, true success. In fact, this love makes us lovable by others. “Lo! Those who believe and do good works, the Beneficent will appoint for them love” (Qur’an, Maryam, 19:96). My observation is that of the couples who seek counseling, those who improve significantly are those who learn to nurture their marriage on a daily basis with loving words and actions. The Prophet (SAW) used to kiss his wives frequently, drink from the same cup in the same spot where A’isha put her lips, and help out with household chores. Strive to make your spouse feel like the most special person in the world to you. Here are three examples of how to create this environment, in your own mind and in your home:

    Realize that your spouse is precious: Reflect on this profound reality and it will slowly become engrained in your mind and actions. Indeed, we have a great example in the deep love that the Prophet (SAW) had for his wife A’isha (RAA): “When the Prophet was asked which person he loved most in the world, the Prophet replied, A’isha’…”

    “Believe” in your spouse: This is absolutely essential in strengthening the marital bond and helping your spouse achieve his/her goals. Khadija (RAA), sets a great example for us. Long after she passed away, the Prophet (SAW) would often remember her and say: “…she believed in me when everyone else disbelieved in me; when they belied me she trusted me; when no one would help me, she helped me with her money. Allah (SWT) gave me children from her and denied me children from any other woman.” Having a positive and loving perception of our spouses has a great impact on how we interact with them. Having a negative perception of our spouses has a negative impact on our interactions with them. At the heart of many marital problems is a poor perception of a spouse, which usually involves our focusing on the other’s shortcomings rather than on our own, letting negative thoughts run wild and building a mental case against the worst aspects of the spouse rather than building an emotional support system for their best aspects.

    We know that the Prophet’s wives were actual participants in relaying the transformational message of Islam to the world. In this regard, the Prophet (SAW) and the whole community supported them. This has practical implications for us today. Husbands must understand the tremendous need in our society for the talents, creativity, insights, and wisdom of women. What follows from that is providing practical support for a wife to pursue her dreams and fulfill her obligation as an active participant in society. All this, of course, would occur while keeping a balance between the duties of a home and the demands of society. That is giving fullest support to our spouses: believing in their capabilities and helping them achieve their goals.

    Give your spouse your undivided attention: Spend uninterrupted time wholeheartedly listening to his or her dreams, fears, insights, thoughts, needs or whatever they want to talk about. This also means that we have to create a safe haven in our homes, where our spouses can speak their minds without fear of being judged or ridiculed.

    When we love someone abundantly, we are inclined to being more merciful, tolerant, and patient with his/her shortcomings. And rahma is the third foundation of a healthy Islamic marriage.

    Rahma

    Rahma has many meanings and levels. With regard to the spouse, it means having mercy with his/her faults and mistakes as well as protecting and covering their shortcomings. In fact, the root word of rahma is the same as the word rahem (the womb), thereby evoking more intimate, beautiful meanings of mercy. The womb is safe and nurturing, allowing growth without impediment. Marriage should be naturally easygoing and nurturing for both spouses to appreciate each other’s differences and to grow together without obstacle. Spouses live together day in and day out and gradually let most of their guards down. Therefore, they may be very vulnerable and sensitive because their deficiencies and weaknesses are readily visible to the other.

    One of the greatest ways of showing rahma is being the advocate for your spouse, especially in situations when they are reluctant to speak up for themselves, such as tense moments with the in-laws.

    It is clear that without rahma, a marriage would be a daily struggle and a slide into depression, chronic stress, and even physical illness. Then just the act of being “at home” becomes a struggle, let alone being able to face the many other challenges outside the home. Lack of mercy impedes growth in any relationship, preventing a spouse from feeling confident enough to reveal his/her weaknesses and to work on overcoming them. With rahma, tranquility and peace envelop the house. Only when we feel truly accepted, can we flourish to our highest potential. People feel relaxed when living in an atmosphere of tolerance and understanding. We become truthful with nothing to hide. There is no longer any need to wear a mask or feel tense. There are many elements of mercy such as acceptance, approval, compassion, connectedness, consideration, flexibility, gentleness, humility, kindness, self-awareness, tranquility, tolerance, and understanding. All these elements should guide our demonstration of rahma towards our spouses. There are many ways to show rahma to the spouses:

    Showing rahma with their faults: when something is not major, let it go.

    When they are weak, sick, or stressed, cater to their special needs and do something extra, such as buying them their favorite foods, taking time off from work to care for them, serving them breakfast in bed, calling them at work/home to see how they are doing, offering warm soup or a nicely brewed cup of tea.

    Be flexible. In his book, “Finding the Love of Your Life,” Dr. Neil Clark Warren talks about flexibility as the one personality trait that covers a multitude of differences. “It is this quality that can take over when two people discover, after their wedding, that they have some critical differences. If both people have a generous portion of flexibility woven into their personalities, they can make important adjustments.”

    One of the greatest ways of showing rahma is being the advocate for your spouse, especially in situations when they are reluctant to speak up for themselves, such as tense moments with the in-laws.

    Show tolerance and acceptance of your spouse’s extended family and the people he/she cares about. This is a crucial element for any couple and can often make or break a marriage. In counseling, I have seen many conflicts arise from one of the spouse’s lack of attention to their partner’s need to host or welcome their extended family.

    Be creative about the possible ways to show rahma to your spouse. The key is to stay attuned to their rahma needs by seeking feedback from them about what you can do to assist and make life easier for them.

    The Benefits of the Islamic Model of Marriage

    A marriage based on the solid foundations of taqwa, mawadda, and rahma is sure to reap many bounties and blessings from Allah (SWT). In the company of such spouses and insha’Allah healthy and pious offspring, our marriage can truly be the answer to the following supplication: “…Our Lord! Grant us in our spouses and offspring the comfort and delight of our eyes and give us [the grace] to lead the righteous” (Qur’an, Al-Furqan, 25:74). Marriage is conducive to our emotional, psychological, spiritual and intellectual growth. It helps us become useful contributors to society. When we have such peaceful and happy homes, built according to the teachings of Islam, we will live in a heaven on earth. We can have very calm and easeful souls in the middle of life filled with challenges and difficulties only when we believe in Allah (SWT). This is the true joy of living Islam.

  • A Time to Speak: Where is Our Compassion?

    I always knew there would come a day when I would finally succeed in getting almost everyone mad at me. This may be that day because I’m going to be unusually candid and open about a certain, often suppressed, issue. As one sister pointed out, people only get mad because the truth hurts. If that’s true, then there should be a lot of self-reflection from a lot of angry people.

    There are multitudes of thoughts floating around in my mind all the time. You know how it is: you’ll see something and it will make you think for a moment. Perhaps you’ll use that as an example one day, you say to yourself, and you hope you remember it during an opportune time. But have you ever reached the point where so many little thoughts piled up inside your head that you felt you had better dump them out on the table before they crush your mind under their weight? I’ve reached that point, and it’s time to unload.
    A strange paradox: When you read about how the Blessed Prophet (pbuh) and the Sahaba treated poor people, what image do you get? Basically, poor people were the majority in the masaajid all over early Islamic Arabia. Poor Muslim converts used to even sleep in the Prophet’s own Masjid at night because they had nowhere else to go. (Hence the nick-name “Bayt as Saff.”)

    So many Quranic verses and ahadith extol the virtue of the poor and the feeding and welcoming of the poor. The less-fortunate were welcomed and encouraged by the community of believers. Almost all the Muhajireen experienced bitter poverty in the early Madinan period. But the Ansar came to the rescue, as they were able, and shared half of their wealth with the refugees from Makkah. It was just a great time of caring and inclusion.

    Fast forward to today: I’m walking to one of those “culturally-oriented” masaajid in a major American city. The majority of the people who attend there are from a country I will not name. Standing in front of the gates to the large, spacious masjid is a young woman on crutches; her feet are gnarled, and it’s obvious that one leg is skinnier than the other. She’s a cripple. She stands there, holding a cup in her hand and pathetically tries to keep her hijab, (which is white though a little stained,) from blowing across her face. She begs for money in a soft, weak voice, from the Muslim men as they enter the masjid for Jumu’ah salah. As I near the front of the building myself, I notice that the throngs are entering without even looking at her or hearing her say, “Salam” in her lilting, low voice.
    As a Muslim, and a person who tries to feel sympathy with others, I give her some money. She smiles with the grateful smile of a person who received something that will affect her life in a much bigger way than it would ever affect mine. Then I go inside. Every week it continues like that. Then, one day, the leader in the masjid makes an announcement. He tells the hundreds of Muslims present that we had better not give money to any “beggars” who hang out in front of the Masjid. He warns that if we do that, then we’ll have “beggars all over the place” like “we” do “back home.”

    Giving in charity to the poor, whether Muslim or not, is an Islamic duty highly recommended by Allah and His Messenger

    A little thought came to my mind: Why not invite the beggars in and show them Islam? Why not help them and thereby increase the size of our “community.” (After all, these masjid-going immigrants were losing their children to kufr at an alarming rate and the masjid might be deserted after these righteous parents died!) Why not help that poor, crippled woman in and treat her with kindness and give her good instruction and support? I, of course, could not obey the order of this hired “leader” because giving in charity to the poor, whether Muslim or not, is an Islamic duty highly recommended by Allah and His Messenger.

    A few months later, a group of sisters wanted to hold a conference in that masjid. Because this city is a rough place, they wanted to hire some Muslim brothers to act as security guards to protect the masjid from outside intruders while their conference was going on. When the leadership of the masjid found out that the brothers in question were from a different ethnic group, the leadership refused to endorse the idea and forbade the presence of such “dangerous, low class” people.

    Because of a change in my job situation, I had to switch masaajid for Friday prayer. This new masjid was established by another immigrant group from a different country that I will not name. Let me tell you, until you get around, you really cannot appreciate how much ignorance there is in the world. All the backward things you can ever imagine exist in this place, and I sit there watching everything and get more frustrated. If you put all the good intentions aside, there are some really ignorant Muslims running around; people who know nothing about Islam- or anything else for that matter!

    Holding riches is like holding water. It will slip through your fingers
    until you come on Judgment Day holding nothing. Good deeds and charity are much better to pursue in this world

    Back to the story. A few weeks after I began attending this new masjid, a lone, old woman in hijab began coming to beg from the worshippers before they entered the masjid for Jumu’ah. There was no room for any women in this “masjid,” so she couldn’t come in for prayers even if she wanted to. I remember walking to that masjid on one bitterly cold day—a day in which my skin felt like it was turning to brittle paper—and I saw her there with no gloves and a thin jacket on.

    I, of course, gave what I could and was about to enter when I realized I was hurrying to get inside because I was very cold. The thought hit me that she couldn’t come inside because there was no provision for women in there, and the leadership there would probably throw her out anyway. I sat there feeling guilty the entire Jumu’ah service. When I left, she was still out there begging for a quarter or a dollar here and there from the departing “worshippers.” When I was almost back in the office, the thought hit me that I could have given her my gloves. I felt guilty the rest of the day for not doing it.

    Every Friday, I would see her there, sitting on the stone steps and begging with obvious sorrow on her face. The masjid leaders must have seen her sitting on “their” steps one day because when I arrived to the masjid a few weeks later, the old woman in hijab was sitting on the cold dirt on the other side of the sidewalk in front of the masjid.

    As I sat in that crowded, yet barren-seeming building, I listened to one of the leaders exhorting the worshippers to put money in the box being passed around so they could pay off the bank loan on the Masjid. I again felt weird inside. As the box got closer to me and I saw people dropping ones, tens, and twenties into it, I thought about the shame I would feel when the box came to me and everyone would see me pass it along without depositing anything in it.

    I imagined someone whispering to me, “Brother, you should donate for the sake of Allah.” I had a response planned for that: “I gave everything I had to that old woman out in the cold for the sake of Allah!” I felt the righteous anger prepare itself for a leap. But no one said anything. No one even looked at me. Hey, what did I expect? After going to that masjid for over five months, not a single person there has ever said “Salam” to me or returned one when I offered it—even the “Imam” refused to say “Salam” to me when I said it to him one day. (I also gained the good lesson that I should not care what others see me do as only Allah knows what is in our hearts.)

    A few weeks later, the big ‘Eid was coming up: ‘Eid ul Adha. One of the masjid leaders stood up and began to tell the people the significance of the “Qurbani” or sacrifice of animals and how the meat would be given to the poor to eat. I kid you not—the image of that sister outside smiling at me as I gave her something was frozen in my mind as the leader said that there weren’t really any poor people here in America so everyone should bring their meat to the Masjid so it could be sent to a cannery and sent overseas. It was that impetus that caused me to write this article two hours later. That was the thought that made my cup overflow in a flood!
    What is it with us? Do you remember when the Mississippi river flooded a few years ago, causing wide-spread damage and homelessness in middle America? ICNA Relief did a really heroic thing by suggesting that some funds should be set aside and used to help the people affected by the floods. If you’ll also remember, donations to the Red Cross were in the untold millions; other relief groups also were distributing supplies and money to the grateful people as well.

    Well, here was a Muslim group that wanted to step in and put in its small, but sincere contribution. You wouldn’t believe how certain individuals opposed this plan. They said that rather these funds should be sent overseas. Do you think that this is how the Blessed and noble Prophet (pbuh) would think? Is this the attitude that Islam teaches us to have. I don’t think so! The Blessed Prophet (pbuh) used charity towards non-Muslims to show them the mercy of Islam. I could list dozens of examples where he helped non-Muslims before they accepted Islam. What was the result? They often became Muslims themselves!

    Why would the Prophet (pbuh) visit the evil Umm Jamil, the wife of Abu Lahab who used to curse him and throw thorns in his path, when she was sick? She wasn’t a Muslim. She was even an enemy to him. He could have said, “Oh, Allah is punishing her.” But he didn’t. He went to her and offered his condolences on her sickness. Even Allah says in the Quran that “…you don’t have to put them on the right path before you help them (the needy unbelievers).”

    I’m proud of ICNA for going ahead and setting up its small distribution table during that time of crisis in this country despite the internal opposition. The contribution was minuscule in the grand scheme of things, but the symbolism was weighty. Islam teaches us to have compassion on the poor, needy, and distraught and those people who discourage the feeding of the poor and needy from among the Muslim community (see Surah 107) might find themselves in big trouble on Judgment day.

    What the heck do we fast in Ramadan for? What lessons are we supposed to learn? Let me publicly state that this past Ramadan is the first Ramadan in which I fully internalized the true importance of compassion towards the poor. I am a guy who makes barely more than the poverty level each year, but my faith moves me to give until it hurts.

    The Prophet could have had mansions and palaces built for himself, but he slept in a small room made of bricks. He could have ridden on chariots or wagons pulled by the finest white stallions, but he rode donkeys or camels. His rightly guided successors, Abu Bakr, Umar, Uthman, and Ali all followed the tradition of simple living. Even if they ever amassed a lot of money due to good business practices, they would reserve the bulk of the money for charitable purposes and just give it away. None of them lived in mansions or ate fine food or wore the most expensive clothes.

    Today, our “community” competes with each other in wealth and status. The “pillars of our community” live mostly in costly mansions, drive the finest motor cars, and wear the most expensive clothes. They append their names with the titles of respect of the non-Muslim world such as “Dr.” or “M.D” or “Barrister” and go to great lengths to get other people to use those honorific titles when their glorified and sanctified names are mentioned.

    Since when is a person judged by his titles? Sure, in man-made religions and cultures, you have a caste system and social structure based on the accident of one’s birth.

    Then the poor, title-less Muslims become as subhuman and unworthy as the untouchables in India. We can pass by them and avoid eye-contact. We can shun them from our masaajid, homes, and parties. (“They would probably only soil the carpet anyway with their filth.”) All those Muslims, all that wealth, all that arrogance and false pride in the illusory world that they have built for themselves. “But when the earth is ground to powder…then they will know the reality…” (Quran).

    The Blessed Prophet (pbuh) said he would be close to the poor people on the Day of Judgment. He said the poor will enter Paradise long before the rich. He said save yourself from the fire even with only half a date given in charity. Who knows the examples of Abu Dharr or Umar?

    The Blessed Prophet (pbuh) once remarked that he was afraid for the future of the Ummah on account of all the wealth that would come in its possession. Someone asked him if it were possible for something good (wealth) to really be bad. The Prophet (pbuh) replied that he was afraid that so much wealth would come to Muslims that they would begin to love the world too much, even as former civilizations worshipped worldly wealth. Then he said he was afraid that love of the world would destroy Muslims even as it destroyed earlier civilizations.

    Here I am, I accepted Islam and have given up my love for wealth, status, and honor. But all I see are fellow Muslims racing with each other, not towards goodness, but towards what I saw as false. In their mad chase after wealth, they fail to realize that holding riches is like holding water. It will slip through your fingers until you come on Judgment Day holding nothing. Good deeds and charity are much better to pursue in this world.

    What do we feel towards the poor? Do we feel better than another human being just because of a few possessions that we cannot take with us when we die? The next time you see a poor person, try your best to gauge what your initial reaction is towards them. If you feel even the least bit of disgust inside, then you may have a seed of hypocrisy in you waiting to destroy you.

    I know it is a lot to ask of our “community,” given the shabby and disorganized state we are in right now, but until we banish all distaste for the unfortunate, needy and hungry, we will never make real progress in ourselves, our family, or our movement.

    Consider well and remember the ironies we see every day. Today’s action will determine tomorrow’s reaction. Live with the attitude of a real believer, and don’t be just a “Muslim.” Because believers go to Paradise, while people with just Muslim sounding names are on their own, even as they care for no one.

  • Haiti: Our Compassion can Make a Difference

    Haiti: Our Compassion can Make a Difference

    Once Upon a Time: Haiti’s Past

    Haiti has a long history of tragedy and destruction centuries prior to the devastating earthquake that struck earlier this year. From the Spanish invasion of Hispaniola to the French cessation of what is present day Haiti, this tropical oasis has struggled for a different type of survival. Its natural resources made it the wealthiest land in the Caribbean with its sugar and forestry related industries, but this also came with a heavy price. African slaves were imported by the French in the late 17th century as field labor, and their degrading conditions led to a slave revolt. Eventually, Haiti became the first black republic to gain independence and unfortunately, began to spiral downward soon after. For most of its independent reign, Haiti has suffered at the hands of internal strife due to political violence and, as a result, is now one of the poorest countries in the Western Hemisphere. With the forced resignation and exile, after an armed rebellion, of Haiti’s president Aristide in 2004 and the interim government set up by the United Nations, Haiti saw a glimmer of hope with a democratically elected president in 2008. But once again, violence erupted in the land in the form of a 7.0 magnitude earthquake that wreaked havoc on the citizens of the country unlike any violence of the past.

    Just west of the Dominican Republic, Haiti lies between the Caribbean Sea and North Atlantic Ocean. Somewhat smaller than the size of Maryland, this country holds a slightly rough and mountainous terrain. However, despite its majestic surroundings, Haiti lies in the middle of the hurricane belt with weather conditions that result in floods, earthquakes, and occasional droughts making potable water an environmental crisis. With a population slightly tipping over the nine million mark, the citizens of Haiti face a lower chance of life expectancy due to diseases and infections, especially AIDS and others that follow its natural disasters such as Hepatitis A and E, Malaria, Typhoid and Dengue fever. Haitians speak either French of Creole and, though close to eighty percent practice Roman Catholicism, nearly half of the population practices voodoo. In an ever changing world, Haiti sits at the forefront of those in need of aid both in the aftermath of the earthquake and in the many years to come.

    Dozens of mosques are scattered throughout Haiti with an estimated 5,000 Muslims as the numbers rapidly grow. The foundation of Islam began with the African slave laborers who were initially forced to give up their practice of the religion; however, their heritage soon became imbedded in the native Haitian culture. The 20th century saw a large number of Arab immigrants settling in Haiti while a significant amount traveled to the Americas. It has been noted that the first Arab settlers were from Morocco.


    Rising Action: Earthquake Aftermath

    The earthquakes in Pakistan and Indonesia were known for the mark they left not only in terms of their magnitude, but also the destruction they left behind. With hundreds of people dead or unaccounted for, thousands of homes destroyed, and even more people left without food and work, relief agencies scurried to pool together the basic necessities for survival. There was an overwhelming response from the global community with regard to these two natural disasters, but like the forgotten faces of these troubled people, the media and world at large returned to their daily routines. The earthquake that rung in the New Year seemed to be no different than those that preceded it. January 12th marked the day a 7.0 magnitude earthquake rocked Haiti’s capital of Porte au Prince leaving in its path complete and utter devastation. Within days, media outlets were buzzing about the strength of the quake and its effect on this forgotten country. Similarly, relief agencies from across the globe were preparing their supplies as they took ships, planes, cars, and buses to this inaccessible city. Organizations such as UNICEF, Red Cross, and the International Rescue Committee began running drives across the world to raise funds for these victims. Similarly, Muslim relief orgs and Islamic countries pooled together their resources and manpower to deliver whatever they could.


    Climax: Haiti Receives a Helping Hand

    Human beings regardless of race, religion, ethnicity, age, and gender all require food, shelter, water, and companionship to survive. Once stripped of any of these basic necessities, the human being falls into a bout of irritability, depression, and instability. The key to any given response in emergency relief work is to keep the end in mind—in other words, relief work should address the current situation by gauging what is needed to facilitate survival and follow this with the necessary skills and training of the victims in order for them to ensure a secure future for themselves. A majority of the aid work that took place in Haiti targeted the medical needs of the Haitians, which was immediately required; this was followed with the importing of tents and sleeping bags to temporarily house the thousands of people who slept on the streets out of fear of the aftershocks that continued to rock the epicenter. However, as the weeks went by, the focus on what Haitians needed to regain their sense of normalcy was removed. Fortunately, the few organizations that remained behind continued to make progress and attempted, with the Haitian people, to remain hopeful that there would be a positive future in store for the country.

    “True heroism is very undramatic. This is because true heroism is not the desire to surpass all others by any means, as we unfortunately see all too often. Instead, true heroism is the desire to serve all others by any means. By this definition, heroes are in no short supply in Haiti. I’ve seen them here every day for the past week. I’ve seen them come from all nationalities working for all types of organizations with a common goal in mind: to aid a country in its darkest hours,” shares Umair Javed, a volunteer in the Youth for Haiti program organized by Helping Hand for Relief and Development (HHRD). This program invited college students from all over the country to participate in volunteer relief work in Haiti during their respective spring break. After a rigorous selection process, nearly 30 college students were chosen to spend four week-long rotations in batches of 10 to volunteer in medical assistance and building shelter villages alongside supervised professionals.

    Falling Action: Building Haiti

    HHRD set out to rebuild Haiti by constructing hundreds of permanent shelters. The cost of $900 per shelter would give thousands of victims who have turned homeless after the earthquake a place to live with their families. These shelters were constructed into a village where they also built a mosque and school. With over 200 children playing amidst the rubble, parents welcomed this move to provide their children with an education that also helped to keep them occupied and safe. With Ramadan slowly making its way, the mosque was a breathe of fresh air for the new converts to Islam and Muslims who struggled to make inner peace after seeing such large scales of devastation and death. Millions are living in unsanitary conditions, cultivating more infections by the day.

    Moreover, doctors from Pakistan, Indonesia, the United States, and local Haitians worked round the clock to tend to the wounded. Six rotational clinics were being operated in the most remote areas with little or no medical help. These Medical Clinics treated more than 2,000 people per week, and vaccinations were provided to over 300 men, women, and children. Originally, a team of volunteer doctors of HHRD from Florida and New York took large supplies of medications bought for them by HHRD to Port-au-Prince. Over $160,000 worth of medication was administered to over 11,000 patients. These doctors helped to establish the mechanism for field and mobile clinics where they have volunteered roughly 1,000 hours of services along with an estimated 900 hours by nurses. Due to urgent need, a full-time local Haitian Doctor was hired, accompanied by a female doctor who especially tended to women’s health issues.

    With over 2,000 hours of volunteer work conducted by those at HHRD in Haiti, many respected community leaders have traveled abroad to witness and monitor the relief efforts. Naeem Baig, Vice President of the Islamic Circle of North America (ICNA) and Executive Director of ICNA Council for Social Justice, along with Imam Abdool Rahman Khan, Scholar of Islamic Foundation in Illinois and Member of ICNA Executive Council were two of the most prominent members to have gone. The work HHRD is doing abroad is essential and ongoing. They visited the Medical Camps and met with the Muslim community leaders to assess the situation and lend their support. “A lot still has to be done here,” said Imam Abdool Rahman. He also had a chance to meet some of the college students that are there for the Youth for Haiti program. “It’s a very humbling experience to come here; life here is tough, and they (the volunteers) say they enjoy it and are willing to come back.”

    Resolution: Let Us Not Forget

    “I have to admit that I am absolutely amazed and inspired by the people of Haiti. Despite their poor living conditions, they were so full of life and optimism. I’m amazed by their spirit, their perseverance, and their rare ability to find happiness in even the smallest of things. They were the most hospitable people I have ever come across. I personally feel a bit guilty because I feel that I benefited more from them than they have from me,” shares Raihan Dakhil a volunteer in the Youth for Haiti program.

    Despite centuries of strife, the people of Haiti hold in their hearts an appreciation for what they have today: their lives, their families, and their country. Though each day brings with it another struggle, these victims have been given the essential tools to help rebuild their lives and hopefully to ensure a better future. The work there is far from over—the country requires long term developmental projects such as sanitary water, educational institutions, properly utilizing natural resources, and much more. Hundreds of children are now orphans, while hundreds of women are now widows, but within each, there lies a vow to never forget how things were and to always remember that at least now life is better than before. As human beings and more importantly as Muslims, we cannot turn a blind eye to the evil in this world and the tragedy that millions are facing. Let us be those who lend a helping hand and dust off the fallen for today’s calamity can be tomorrow’s reality for many of us. Haitians are putting back together the pieces of their shattered lives, but instead of forcing them into place, they are stepping back to make sure each piece fits properly in order to ensure the best picture. We, too, must continue to do the same.